Inside the Mind of Crazy

It’s taken me almost two weeks to write this post.

At first it seemed silly to write about my new job when I’d only been there a day, and we’d really only done the typical “first day of school” activities.

Then it seemed silly to write about my job because I was in “holy crap, what have I gotten myself into” mode.

And then it seemed even crazier, because all I wanted to do was cry.  And cry I did.  I spent almost the entire weekend crying and pretending I wasn’t crying.  I slept very little before going into my first day “on the floor” because I would think about something I was anticipating and start crying.  And then I’d hate myself for crying and cry even harder.  For hours.  Sunday sucked people.

And Monday?  Monday was scary.  But you know what?  It was all my in damn head.

Because right now?

Right now I freaking love my job.  I love it so much that I decided to pick up overtime hours this Saturday.

And I know it won’t always be this way.  I’m sure there are days when the job will wear on me.  So for those days, I think I’ll make a list of the reasons I (so far) love my new job:

  • Free workout room that hardly anyone ever uses–at least when I’ve wanted to use it so far.
  • Free popcorn on Fridays
  • The people are friendly and helpful
  • I’m constantly learning, and it should always be that way–everyone says the learn new stuff all the time, even after being there for years and years
  • There are ample opportunities for growth and advancement, in practically any direction you want
  • Parking ramp–I’m looking forward to not having to scrape my truck off when it snows
  • If there are no calls, you can do whatever you want at your desk (as long as its legal)
  • They believe there is such a thing as bad profit, and they value the customer’s (and employee’s) happiness over that extra couple of bucks

This is probably just the beginning, and I’m sure eventually there will be a list of cons as well.  But right now I can say that all the anxiety and fear has been worth it.  I’ve maybe said this before, but no matter what happens with this job, I know I’ve made a valuable leap forward in improving the quality of my life.  I got myself out of my rut, I’m gaining experience, and most importantly I was given a reminder that a lot of the feelings I have about myself and my abilities are all in my head.


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